raymond, raymond, raymond

Hegemony is the dominant group enforcing its ideas on what is normal and what is right. The best example of hegemony I can think of is a television program that "everybody loves."  In fact, even I enjoy this show despite the fact that I believe it perpetuates stereotypes and reinforces gender roles.  In the award-winning television show Everybody Loves Raymond, the protagonist of the story is a middle-aged, middle-class male with a nagging housewife and children in the middle of suburbia (Sounds like 80% of sitcoms, right?) However, the twist is that his intrusive mother and crude father live across the street from them. While the show is known for its quirky characters, it still maintains the essence of normalcy.

Ray, in the center, being charmingly stupid.

What does it mean to be normal in the United States? In the show’s case, normalcy is the husband is the “man of the house” meaning he is the breadwinner and obviously the most important aspect of the show, hence the name.  Furthermore, Raymond is meant to be the funniest of all the characters. While the others, namely Debra, are funny themselves, they are usually being laughed at rather than laughed with.  Raymond is also a sports writer – the “ideal” job of all heterosexual men since of course, all men are infatuated with sports; and by ‘sports,’ it is basically common-sense that it means male-dominated sports. 

Debra is the ideal wife in the situation, besides the fact that she speaks her mind (which the men often joke it would be better if wives did not ‘talk so much’).  She is the cook, the maid, the one who takes care of the children – essentially, the complete package when it comes to being a housewife.  It is mentioned in the show that Debra had earned a business degree, yet she stays at home and “supports her husband” just like a good wife should do. Rather than following her own dreams, she remains in the background behind her husband in an apron (just as the picture above portrays).  Most often she is in the kitchen cooking, being constantly criticized by her mother-in-law (also a housewife) for being a bad cook, or in the bedroom being the gatekeeper for marital activities.  While Marie, the mother-in-law, and Debra are both strong female characters, their strength is often used in order to manipulate or prove a point to the males in the family.

In this clip below, the family berates Robert, the 40+ year old single brother of Raymond.

The question of why Robert needs to find a woman at all is not ever asked.  It is just “common sense” that Robert needs to settle down, have a wife and 2.5 children - just as Ray has.  If he doesn’t, he will “die alone” despite the fact that he has a close family.  In this clip, Marie inquires whether Robert is a homosexual (which subsequently gets a lot of laughs since homosexuality is looked down upon in our culture).  Thus the assumption is that if you are single and older, it must mean you are too afraid to admit that you’re gay. 

All in all, the show reflects how Americans think in terms of the American dream, how each gender behaves or should behave, and portraying what is “normal” in our culture. Does it create these stereotypes? In my opinion, it doesn't; it just reinforces what our society and culture believe is right. However, you can argue that teaching a group of people is done through redundancy, and that is exactly what the show does - it can be said that such shows essentially teach us how to be normal.